Mama Drama

I have belonged to several message boards that have come to an end. Most of it has to do with Mama Drama. Most of these boards were support boards
Why mothers can’t be supportive of one another I don’t know. It’s not a contest to see whose child potty trains first or talks or walks or eats solids or says the alphabet or knows all their numbers first. Yet that is exactly what a lot of the message boards are. It’s a huge mommy competition.
What is should be is women and mothers supporting each other and pooling their knowledge into helping each other and bouncing ideas off one another. Not bashing each other. How sad that, again and again, we moms seem to fall short of being there for each other ... giving in to conflict and disagreements every time.
And heaven forbid if you say you just find it hard to believe that a one year old knows numbers up to twenty—you get flamed for it.
Yes, there is plenty of MamaDrama abounding on these message boards.
Then you have the women who boast about their relationships but again, if you say one word about how you don’t think it’s all peaches and cream, you get nailed. And certainly any talk about income was laughed at. I’ve certainly learned many things about people along the way.
So, I have been hurt on message boards and I know I have hurt others. Some women think they own the market on hurt. I know of a message board that was started because people “had been hurt on other message boards”!! Well duh!! Haven’t we all been there and done that?? Yet a lot of those same women were the cause of some huge hurt when one thread was started. Talk about mama drama—that was it at it’s finest. I guess the old saying is true: “birds of a feather flock together”.
In seeing these message boards fold, I’ve learned that a lot of the issues have to do with lack of communication or miscommunication, and personal attacks. Is it so hard to ask someone something if you have an issue with them, or to contact someone you may have an issue with??
The animosity and hateful words I have experienced on these boards has been almost too much. Righteous people acting like they are not at fault at all, when the fact is their very behavior was the cause of the drama. It’s laughable when one board in particular started out of the drama of another support board, yet the moment the new board came into existence, there was drama and controversy behind the scenes and the admin allowed it to continue which I believe led to this particular boards demise.
In belonging to an online community, you come to think of the participants as friends too. Sometimes there are meet-ups and you actually get to know these women in person. Friendships seem to form. I’ve learned that people sometimes pretend to be your friend when they aren’t really. I’ve learned that some of these women were never my friends at all.
Needless to say, I haven’t been posting much on any message boards lately. Just taking a step back and reassessing the whole message board thing. I'm pretty sure it happens on all message boards but I know a lot of hurt feelings can be alleviated with simple communication. Often even simple communication seems too hard for some. Before assuming something, next time try communication to clarify, sometimes it really works and you can avoid all kinds of hurt feelings.